I will begin this blog by first admitting that I love French romance films. I love sitting down on a Saturday night or any other night of the week to watch the fantastical lives of a leading male and leading female fall hopelessly in love. Everything about these films pull at my heart strings. These films set the stage for the love wanting audience to dream of the day they will one day meet that person who makes them feel complete. My question is do these films contribute to unrealistic expectations of what healthy relationships are meant to be. Many of these films end with a big wedding or a loved one running into the arms of their soul mate for an embrace that last way past the credits and into our heart and homes at night. I know that this may sound cynical of me but that is not my intention. As I stated earlier, I love sitting down to a good French romance film; I can't really stomach the American ones. Also, I'm in love with the woman of my dreams. She's taking a nap on the couch as I glance over at her beautiful face every few sentences. However, this doesn't change my belief that these films are a breeding ground for self-seeking in the extreme. Just like everything else in our culture, the message is that we are not enough the way that we are. Hollywood is constantly telling us that we need to be something other then who we are. We need that special person. We need that winning touch down or that woman that takes us a whole 2 hours to win over. The movie usually ends with that goal being reached and all of life's problems solved.
Many of us leave the theater feeling somewhat down and less then we did when we walked into the theater. We usually don't realize that the film contributed to this less then feeling because we've been feeling like this most of our lives anyhow. There's a part of us deep down inside that doesn't believe in this hollywood dream. We've been trying it all our lives and it doesn't work. In my experience healthy relationships only work when we are able look within ourselves to feel whole. If we look toward another person to meet all of our unreasonable expectations we will never be happy. We fail to realize that no person can make us happy. This is the opposite of one of hollywoods greatest lines "I can't live without you". Wow who can reach that bar!
So you may be wondering what this blog is getting at. Well I don't really know. I'm just starting a discussion and leaving it open for all to contribute. As a film-maker I'm interested in the views of others. I would love to make a romance film one day but I'd like to approach it from a different angle. I'd like the audience to walk away from my film with a sense of true encouragement and identification. I'd like them to realize that they have everything they need right now. They don't need that winning leading lady or leading male. Now how do I share "that" message to an audience? I'll leave that for my next blog. For now I'd like to hear from you.
Peace
I can't agree more. You're leading lady is very lucky. It's lovers and dreamers like you that make the movies "real". When you blog about your experience, and she tells a friend, and they read and or share your amazing love story, and so on and so forth . Before you know it a director reads your blog, or hears of the passion, and says "hey, Im gonna make a movie". ultimately art imitates life we know this. what we see on the screen is, dramatized, embelished, or not? Its all in ones personal experience, perception, but its real.
ReplyDeleteI also like to watch a Romance film but usually a comedy as I love to laugh. I find them entertaining and like the highs and lows the cast go through. We all have to remember that these are for entertainment purposes and do not truly always reflect real life. They can be a big encouragement to those who are unlucky in love and can give the down trodden the heart to move on in search for the special person they are looking for. For instance I know this is a American film Ade but Hitch was brilliant and sure it would encourage many a slightly overweight guy with not much self esteem to continue in his search for true love and also to set aside beliefs that ‘she is to pretty for me’ and any other negative thoughts. God has made all of us as individuals and there is no real change needed from us other than to be accepting to His Word and our Lord Jesus Christ as he has all in place and someone for everyone. This was proved to me buy a Swedish guy who came to my church from Sweden as is working in UK he is overweight but had a heart for God cut a long story short he has found true love and getting married soon while I see other great looking people still struggling outside of God.
ReplyDeleteMany of us have learned what we know of "love' from TV & the movies. Much our what we expect come with a laugh track and credits at the end. In society we are not often asked to use our imagination. We are taught that imagination is the stuff of fantasy & Hollywood as if we are not all equipped with one. Many don't apply their imagination to "love" and are left with what is marketed to us. We don't know why a diamonds or flowers or chocolates are important many just buy them and expect the shared mythology to fill in the emotional gaps. Its all packaged for our consumption this is why Romantic movies particularly almost never have sad endings. You can set your watch to when the happy ending is about to kick it...what I'm trying to say is YES & NO If your aspiration is to have what a team of writers,actors, lighting and makeup people worked on for 2 years to be your life goal then yes perhaps its "too high" but if you choose to see life & love as a journey inward and designed by you then NO. Those folks in the NO category can see if for what it is packaged fluff....and no judgements if you like fluf. Sometimes fluf is nice.
ReplyDeleteI love a bit of fluff now and again,however i do find myself thinking at the end "only in the movies" lol, as i do think the simplicity in which it is betrayed is generally unrealistic.So i guess its yes and no as whilst i enjoy it as light entertainment to see it as reality would be setting the bar too high i think. They tend to portray the falling in love part, that euphoric stage of attraction and excitement which is then enough for the two of course very attractive leading characters to live happily ever after. In reality any one can achieve this but love first starts with oneself which can then be extended to someone else which takes time and commitment. Perhaps a film showing this would be nice.
ReplyDelete@ Cheryl. Nicely said. Thanks for contributing to my blog!!
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